Salvation...

My last Christmas was very different. Jaxon and I weren't doing so hot (understatement of the year) and things were very hard for me. Feeling in the Spirit Christmas was not super, AND I FREAKING LOVE CHRISTMAS! If someone would have told me that I would be in Georgia with Jax. Happily! In a new pretty house and a new career and we WOULD BE PLANNING FOR A SPRING BREAK SEALING. I would have told you to stop being mean to me.
The year before last-everything I'd ever known and believed in was challenged. Last year-it was coming slowly back inside of my heart and this year, Its here. In abundance. I have had an intense 27 years but I choose to look at my crows-feet (damn things) as coming from the wonderful joys I have experienced. I have always loved Korbin and Allie but to know inside, what I have endured for them to have the life they have- makes me love them more. To look at an imperfect (by allot) face in the mirror and know that its still a good face. A face that knows Father in Heaven intimately, a reflection that knows despair and has slowly risen out of the ashes being held by Him is a face I'm okay with seeing tomorrow.
To look at my lovey. Who was, is, and always will be-my lovey. To see how he works himself in every aspect now. Spiritually, mentally and physically. To witness someone who had everything-lose it and then day by day earn it back. In my book he deserves to be looked at now with honor. I cant wait till we have the priesthood in our house for the first time. I can't wait to see him want to baptize our children.
Christmas is about the world finally receiving it's salvation. Salvation comes. Slowly or quickly it does come. This year I am very excited to be celebrating it with my lovey, my Korbin and my Miss. Allie.
If I were to die tomorrow I'd want the people I'd loved to know without any doubts-I loved my Savior and I worked for that relationship. I loved the Gospel, in the scriptures it says 'we are delivered from our sorrows' and I get that. Ive felt it and not only tasted it I chewed and swallowed it. I never want to die and have the door open and have Christ say 'Do I know ye?' My goal is for him to throw those doors open before I've hit the sidwalk and shout 'Brittney, we've been waiting! My friend, my sister,-Welcome.' I would want you to know that Im totally innaproptate and totally fine with that-If I want to wear a big hat Im gonna and I love what I love with no excuses. I have always felt that you only have one life-you'de better hustle if you wanna make it awesome. But, for the first time in my adult life I can say that Im feeling it (watch someone's gonna call me cause I ticked them off=)) I have worked so hard to learn and grow and like who I am and where Im at and there have been many road blocks but I just collect them now and keep on goin-cause at least finally-I know where I am going...